Thanks

It’s the day before Thanksgiving and I’m still alive. Hello World! In case you forgot who I am, I’m Tiffany. How I’ve missed you! What a semester it has turned out to be! By far the most stressful and overwhelming. The first since returning to school that I have wondered, “what the heck am I doing, I can’t be a teacher!” Yet here I am having gotten through the most difficult part and coasting to the finish line! The Lord has carried me through, and of course I always knew He would and never doubted a moment I would see the other side! I have much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving. I feel full of warm fuzzies just thinking about returning home to Waukesha to be with my family. This year I will have my sweetheart by my side, the love of my life. Could it get any better? I can hardly wait to be in the warm cozy house, to smell the yummy food cooking, and watching football! My mom will give me hugs and kisses and Matt will annoy the heck out of me. Heather will continue to amaze me with her ability to cook and create and make the holiday so special. Dad will be Dad and I’ll have it no other way. And MIKE, well he will be there. I will hope he finds the time with my family as special as I do, and I for once in my life, will not be wishing the whole day that Mike was there to share the time with me because he WILL be right by my side! I am so grateful for my family and for all those who love me and support me!

This has possibly been one of the most difficult semesters yet, by far the most discouraging. For the first time since returning to school I have had serious doubts about my decision to become a teacher. The question “am I really cut out for this” keeps popping into my head, and let me tell you, it is hard to get that thought out of there. If it wasn’t for a strong sense that this is truly what the Lord has for me, I’m sure I would have dropped out a long time ago. I realize that my struggles are mainly related to the fact that I decided to “double up” on classes this semester. It seemed a small price to pay in order to graduate a semester earlier. Leading into the second half of my first semester in Cohort 46 I knew I was going to be busy, I had no idea what I was getting myself into. Never again…but I’ll be doing the same next Fall. Thanksgiving is just a few short weeks away and I keep telling myself if I can just make it to Thanksgiving I should be able to make it to the end of the semester. That is, of course, as long as I don’t die before then! It is something to look forward too, though.

Reality

I decided I wanted this blog to document my journey to becoming a teacher and don't believe a lack of blogging is going to effectively accomplish my goal. Though, the silence in my blogging is perhaps the best picture of the reality of my current schedule. I have time for nothing "fun" and even when I decide to set aside my homework the guilt I feel for not doing that homework is pathetic! This is honestly the busiest I have ever been in my life. Between work and school I feel there isn't even enough time to sleep. Regardless, this is my life and I know that it will all end soon enough and I will look back and feel proud of myself.

The Basic Skills exam was a few weeks ago. Certainly the first time since my ACT test that I had to sit in a room for hours and answer multiple choice questions by filling in tiny little circles. I was clearly out of practice and left the test site feeling horrible depressed. I have no idea how I did, in fact, I'm not sure I even passed. All my own insecurities came flooding in and I felt plain old stupid. So much for that A in algebra class...I could hardly finish the math section on the test. All well, such is life, and I can always test again (I'll have to).

I am starting another class this Monday, Contemporary World Affairs, which is going to stretch my brain for sure. Of course I feel no interest in the subject at all, but am hoping I surprise myself. At least I find the professor for the class hilarious and I know she will keep me awake for those 4 long hours of class every Monday night. This class will end when the semester ends, so if I can just make it to....December! Wow, that's so far away.

Reality is - I'll live through it all. I guess that is a good thing. Besides, I have no idea what I would do with myself if there wasn't homework to do every night! Well, wait, maybe I could do laundry, or wash dishes, clean the bathroom, read a book, watch TV, do a puzzle, visit a friend, sleep....ah, those things can all be done AFTER school!

The Light

Could it be that there is a light at the end of the tunnel? Hard to believe, but I am actually just a few short weeks from the start of my Cohort at Trinity International University. This means that I am FINALLY beginning classes in my major, something I thought was never going to happen! I have joked for the past year that I was going to be 99 when I finally got to graduate and that I would need a walker to get me across the stage to get my diploma. While more of a joke to make my coworkers laugh, I began to feel like it might all come true. To my surprise I have been able to squeeze my way into a cohort this fall. I still have six general education credits to complete, but that can be done while taking classes in my major. I think I will be able to pull it all off. The light?!? Well, I can see it, but it is still pretty far way!